I had the immense pleasure of interviewing Melissa Jones of the Sexology Institute and Boutique in San Antonio, Texas last week. A few weeks ago, through the magic of social media, I stumbled across an announcement for a workshop on dealing with painful sex held at her shop. Whaaaa? Intrigued, I looked up her site, was impressed, and arranged to speak with her.
While the Sexology Institute and Boutique opened this past February 2015, Jones has been a sex educator and coach since 2008. A member of the Church of Latter Day Saints, aka a Mormon, she led summer camps for girls as her kids were growing up. One night after the campers were asleep in their tents, the moms were sitting around the fire and started talking about how unhappy they were with their sex lives. They felt like it was a job, or didn't find it very pleasurable, or were frustrated in their attempts to improve it.
A lightbulb went off. Jones, who had been raised by parents who portrayed sex in a positive light and were open to discussing it, thoroughly enjoyed the sex life she had with her husband. In her view, sex was a gift with the potential to bring couples closer together; it could be empowering and loving, and she wanted other women to have that. In addition, she was troubled by the negative attitudes towards sex that her children were picking up at school and in the wider community.
She became a Certified Sexologist and started offering private coaching sessions in her San Antonio office in 2008. She also offers sessions for individuals and couples for out-of-towners through Skype. Along with a great team of women, she opened her shop, which also includes an erotic art gallery and workshop and event space, this past winter. It's walking distance from the Alamo should you ever find yourself in San Antonio! While she personally reserves sex for marriage, she realizes that the world is a diverse place and works with men and women of different sexual orientations, partnered, polyamorous, or single. Her goal is to empower men and women to have a healthy sex life.
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Usually at this point in hearing about some awesome sex-positive resource or person, I scan their offerings and notice, hmm, that's great but they don't seem to know anything about v pain. Blerg.
But this is where Jones is different! On her website under coaching services, she specifically notes painful sex as an issue she helps with; and she has had not one but TWO workshops on painful sex, presented by Peggy Francis, DNP (Doctor of Nursing Practice,) within six months of opening her storefront.
Turns out roughly 30% of her clients deal with painful sex. Whaaaa? Thirty percent? Yup, you read that right.
Not only that, Ms Jones has interstitial cystitis and lupus, so she is no stranger to the challenges chronic illness can bring to the bedroom.
Nest week, part 2! Let's learn what this rockin' lady has to teach us about how v pain doesn't have to keep you from a rewarding sexuality.
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